Reality Sucks……

Jami – So I have been walking around on auto-pilot for the last few days. Sort of in a state of non-reality.

My dad passed away this past Sunday. I’ve kept this event pushed out of my mind as I have numbly walked through the past 3 days. However, I just went to the funeral home to drop off pictures and reality tried to rush back in.

If I didn’t know the truth I could almost say he’s sleeping. Which is something that didn’t happen easily for him. I half expect him to open his eyes and shoot me a sarcastic remark for watching him sleep.

The tears that I’ve kept at bay are starting to show themselves as I tell him I love him and I’ll miss him.

I know that he is no longer in pain and I’m grateful for that but that doesn’t change the fact that I wish he was still here with us. He makes us better in a way that I can’t explain. He can express anything to you with a quiet look. We always knew how he felt about us even without words. I love you dad and you will forever be in my heart.

Keri – As I sit in my mother’s temporarily quiet living room trying to find the right words, I have come to the realization I am still too raw to describe how I feel.

As many of you know, Jeff and I took our daughter to Colby, Kansas so she could take the first steps toward reaching her dreams.

What I haven’t been able to share is that on Sunday morning my father… my children’s grandfather… The love of my mother’s life, took the final steps of his and passed away in Topeka.

I have been through an emotional gauntlet that has taken me three days to even try to attempt to write about. And as my mom sleeps-something, as you can imagine, she hasn’t done a lot of-I still cannot adequately put into words the extent of the hole my dad’s loss has produced.

I can barely see through the tears welling in my eyes and my body is jerking as I try to hold my sobs at bay long enough to finish.

I love you, Dad, I always have, I always will.

I wish you hadn’t gone, and I am a selfish child who wants you back!

You made my life-all our lives-better.

You are deeply missed.

Amanda – My sweet girl Sherra’s father has passed away. He will be so greatly missed by his daughter, myself and all of his many family and friends. I feel very privileged that I was welcomed into his family by him; such a loving, wise, kind and gentle man.

©2016 Susan Kendall. All rights reserved

About Lily

Born in Topeka, Kansas in the middle of the 20th Century, daughter, granddaughter, niece, sister, cousin, mother, aunt, grandmother, great-grandmother, friend, reader, spiritual, writer, cook, crafter, junker...... twice-married, former non-profit executive in retread mode... currently living a bucket list life in a remodeled schoolhouse.....
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